I was given a stern talking-to over breakfast last week. As I sat there about to dig in to my florentine benedict, I was (once again) reminded of some poor habits I have in the way I talk about myself. I was told that I am humble to a fault and it's not doing me any favors.
And I'm not just saying this to humblebrag about how humble I am.
I am seriously overly-humble in a lot of situations to the point where it's self-sabotaging. Where my thoughts and ideas go unnoticed because I don't make a point to call them out. Where I'm perfectly fine playing the background and letting other people be the star. Where getting a compliment = awkwaaaard because I'm quick to discount it with "oh, I try" or "girl please, this is nothing" instead of simply saying "Thank you." Where I'd much rather talk about what you're up to so I don't have to talk about myself.
I am much more comfortable to just work/live/create/be and let that speak for itself. But, NEWSFLASH: it doesn't.
Last week drove the point home. If I don't speak up when I have an idea, people won't know I have good ideas. If I don't let you know that I think I'm awesome, you won't treat me as such. Nobody is out here waiting to share how awesome I am on my behalf. That's my job and my job only. I have to be my own advocate.
And perhaps I'm too concerned with avoiding criticism, negativity and/or haterade consumers. Because, let's face it, when you put yourself out there, the trolls come out like HAY GIRL. You don't want to speak too highly of yourself, lest you come across as arrogant. And, coming from Chicago, people are quick to call you out if they think you think you're all that. "She's doing too much." "She thinks she's so much." (But, why WOULDN'T you think you're great? You're supposed to! I can write a whole post on that topic. I probably will.)
The bottom line is, in trying to avoid the negative, you also block out the positive. You gotta take the bad with the good - there's no way around it.
This is something I'm consciously working on.
Lastly, there is a huge difference between being your own advocate and being a showoff. I know this - but if I EVER get too close to the line, please check me. Because nobody likes a showoff, including me.
Anybody else have this struggle? Holler at me.